Whether you are were the dumper or the dumpee, break-ups are never pleasant and agonizing are the memories that follow for months to come. Recuperating a heartbreak can get excruciating specially this time of the year, for be it a mall or a restaurant, theater or a park, lovey-dovey couples holding hands, clicking selfies is all you come across – Thank you, Valentine’s Day, for sprinkling some salt on those wounds. Having tried all the chocolates at Hershey’s and ice creams at Cold Stone Creamery, by now you must have identified the futility of the age old tips in getting you through these rough times. Thing is you can’t fix yourself in this situation, only time can do that – you, however, can certainly play along. Here are 10 things you have to do to help yourself survive a break up.
You might have heard people resorting to an all-chocolate-and-ice-cream diet right after a break up. We say invest that cash into a gym membership. Channel all your frustration and energy to heal yourself. Punch that sandbag a little harder – if you need to imagine a face, go ahead. Vent out in the gym, don’t carry the baggage outside.
It’s okay to cry – even after 6 months. A relationship is beyond a Facebook status, and we can’t deny the huge dent it leaves in our hearts. It’s perfectly natural to be hit by a crying jag out of the blue and okay to respond to it. But don’t drown yourself in remorse, listen to some peppy song or watch a rom com to lighten up the mood. When the tears stop, hit the shower and come out a fresh person.
It might seem the hardest not to when you are itching to text, like or comment on their Instagram or stalk on Facebook. But resisting the urge to make that post-break up contact will take you a long way. You might want to stay friends with your ex in the long run, but avoid contacting them just as yet, for the more you stay connected “as friends” the more you will miss being romantically involved.
In fact, we say, you unfriend, unfollow and un-everything your ex from every networking channel. We even recommend blocking them from the networking sites and lose their numbers. As much you’d grow desperate to keep up with the advancements in their lives, you really don’t deserve the pain of seeing them doing just fine without you.
It’s easy to give in to the temptation, but to assure you are abiding by the plan, get busy with other important things in life. Remember you had great friends before this one person became the center of your universe? Surround yourself with them again, go for coffees, lunch – what the hell, go on a road trip. And for the love of God don’t spend all the time bitching about the one you are trying so hard to get out of your hair. Also, DON’T DRINK ALONE.
We don’t recommend spending some ‘alone time’ right after a break-up, but we can’t negate its significance either. ‘Alone time’ doesn’t translate to you listening to sad songs and soaking up the pillow. Once you find some stable ground under your feet, try and stand tall all by yourself – spend some quality time in your own company, its time for self-actualization. Get used to the idea of being a single person without pitying yourself.
Get a hobby, or relive the ones you had to let go on account of your relationship. Maybe your relationship kept you busy, or your special someone didn’t think you were good enough at your craft – regardless of the reason that kept you from exploring the deepest desires of your heart, you can now dive into it and pay mind to no one’s opinion.
Make a bonfire of everything your ex gifted to you – not because you are bitter, but because you need to rid yourself of the memories haunting and dragging you down every time you spread your wings. Most importantly, you need to make room in your life for the new and amazing things life is about to offer, so bid goodbye to the ones that don’t belong here anymore.
Get yourself a new YOU!!! And by new you we don’t mean to suggest in the slightest way that you weren’t ‘good enough’ for that jackass. You need to be a new you, not for revenge but yourself. A little haircut, some perming or straightening, a new wardrobe, or just try a different shade of lipstick – all for yourself; to drag you out of the zone you once shared with someone else.
Don’t be afraid to get into a new relationship just for the bitter taste left in your mouth by the last one. Don’t rush yourself into a relationship because your ex posted a cute picture of himself with someone else. Get into a relationship when you are ready and confident and are sure of the person you are about to offer your precious little heart.
Time takes care of everyone – you will be alright and healed before you know.