Is there a way of knowing where a relationship is headed?
I was talking to a friend who has been having some relationship trouble. Her problem was that men she meets seem interested, they pursue her and then it never seems to work out. She said, “I always seem to pick the wrong men!” and then she proceeded to ask me, how to tell if a man is in it for the long haul! Honestly, the question left me stumped!
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How do you tell if a man is going to stick around? I would say, you can’t! It’s true. Every time a man asked me out, I wondered the same thing. But they didn’t stay until I met my husband. I tried everything to make it permanent – adapted, changed, tried to be nice, fun, saucy, what have you! But I was unhappy being someone I was not, and they didn’t stay. I would say, they didn’t stick with me, because they are in committed relationships with other women.
It seems, there is no formula to this. We can’t look at other people’s relationships and base our hopes on those. Just because a man married a girl after she played hard to get or switched to wearing saris because he liked it, doesn’t mean it would work for all of us. I should know! The last time I tried to play hard to get, the guy vanished saying I was too much hard work!
Verdict – there is no way of knowing where a relationship is headed until it gets there. The best you can do is read the signs and trust your gut.
If it’s been a few months and you still haven’t met his friends, ask yourself why! If the man is serious, he should be okay introducing you to people who matter to him.
If he is mysteriously unavailable at certain times, trust the antenna when it goes up.
If he spends a lot of time telling you that physical intimacy will improve the relationship, and you find yourself spending lots of time in his house or yours, ask him why!
If you think the time is right, ask him, “Where are we headed?”
Above all, Do not make excuses for him! Learn to read between the lines, trust your heart. But before everything, be safe!!! Men are allowed to break your heart, it's part of growing up, but no one should be allowed to fool you or jeopardise your safety! Now go ahead and question Prince Charming about his intentions.
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